Sunday, September 2, 2018

And just like that she was gone.

Then it happened, one minute I was worrying about taking maternity leave, and then worrying about taking extended maternity leave and the next minute I was dropping her off to Pre School. I spend nine months of pregnancy worrying that my career in television was going to come to an end once I had Alessia, that I could never travel again and so on and so on. But as soon as Alessia was born these were the last of my worries, My priorities changed, time stood still and every moment was precious. Work didn’t seem as important as cuddling kissing and loving my little girl. Tending to her every need. It thought me to sit still, all the energy I had put into becoming the best I could be in the tv world was now being used to be the best mother I could be. I was practicing attachment parenting without knowing it. I was just listening to my human instincts going with what the baby wanted. 
So often I heard the questions when will you go back to work? Or you’re too young not to be working, how will you survive? What will you do? But I didn’t worry or care I was going with the flow. I was taking the time to just be. I was going to travel, to allow myself think spend time writing and getting to know my little girl. These moments were precious. So life as I knew it was a distant memory and this for me was bliss.
 I knew I was not going to get child care, I was luckily enough to be able to not have to, I knew I would never be going off to work 5-6 days a week for 8-10 hours s day it wasn’t going to happen.  I was going to figure something else out. I was going to be a full time mother and even more I loved it. All the while, putting different things in place. Finding ways to work around Alessia. We travelled to India to learn to teach yoga. We returned to India to do more yoga, we spend time in New York and Italy.

I then started to teach Yoga while I figured out something long term, and then that became my long term no stress no thought it just happened. It slipped into place last a piece in a jigsaw. I was there in the morning and there in the night and for me that was what mattered. 

Then three years and three months later, my work had paid off; well I like to hope it was what I had done, but most likely personality as Alessia ran in the gates of school without looking back. I wasn’t coming in, she had this and this was her thing. I left as I too had my thing. I had build a career around Alessia and it worked. Life as I knew it, would never be the same again. Alessia had taken that leap into the outside world and it was only the start. I smiled to think how ready and excited she was. That worry and stress of an extended maternity leave became a forgotten memory. But that time I spent with her was priceless. 



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